How to Hire A Babysitter - or Choose A Guardian

Advice For Finding the Perfect Babysitter and Guardian for Your Child

By
Relationship Advice Expert April Masini

My family just moved to a new town and I'm starting a part-time job soon. I'm really excited to get out in the work world again, but I'm nervous leaving my kids home with a stranger. How can I find a babysitter I can really trust and that my kids will like? It also wouldn't hurt to have someone on call in case my husband and I decide we want to get out on a Friday or Saturday night.

Sincerely,

Babysitter Wanted

Dear Babysitter Wanted,

There are many things you must do as you begin your search for the perfect babysitter. Your kids are precious and you don't want to leave them with just anyone.

When hiring a babysitter or nanny:

* Decide what your needs are. Do you need part-time help? Live-in help? Monday through Friday help?

* Decide the best combo for your employee. Is hiring one person the best thing to do? Hiring someone for a five or six or seven day a week job may burn them out. You may be better off hiring one person for three days and one for four days -- or some other combination. This way you also have options if one of them calls in sick.

* Never ever hire a babysitter without checking references. Many people do. You'd be surprised. They think, oh, she looks nice. Wrong. This is your child. Check the references.

* Don't be afraid to ask if your potential employee has any health problems. Babies can catch herpes from another person if the lesions are active. So can children.

* Run a background check on your potential babysitter. It's some of the best money you'll spend. There are also free databases to check for convicted sexual predators.

* Make your needs very clear. Don't rely on the babysitter to remember what you say. Write them down and tell her. This goes for diet, naps, who you want the child to play with and who you don't want the child to play with, where they are allowed to go, TV time, etc. Don't assume anything. If you don't want the nanny driving your child, write it down and tell her.

* Make yourself available to the nanny by leaving her all your numbers and your pediatrician and neighbor numbers. Better safe than sorry.

* Make sure your nanny has a cell phone. If she doesn't, consider getting her one to use just for work so you can reach her.

* Ask if the potential nanny has a husband, boyfriend, children, etc. You want to know what her obligations will be. If she has children, who will take care of them if they get sick when she's scheduled to work for you? The best way to make sure you have backup child care is to plan ahead -- make this a new year's resolution!

Once you have the perfect babysitter:

1. Collect a pool of babysitters. Keep a file somewhere in your kitchen with this list of babysitters, their names, multiple phone numbers and e-mail addresses, and references.

2. Share your babysitter pool with your friends and neighbors, and collect from them, too.

3. Consider a babysitting agency for emergencies. Ask around in advance for what agencies your friends and neighbors like. Ask your child's pediatrician and your child's school teachers.

4. Keep a group of friends and neighbors who will care for your child in emergencies -- and pay it forward with them. Be pro-active about taking care of their kids BEFORE you need help, so you can call in a favor with less guilt.

While choosing a babysitter, you might consider it a good time to think about more serious issues. It's not the most pleasant thing to think about, but who will care for your child should something happen to you? Anything could happen and it's best to be well-prepared, especially when it comes to your children.

Tips on choosing a guardian for your child should you not be able to care for your child:

* Choose someone who is kind and stable. Children need stability and kindness more than anything. Your best friend who used to do mushrooms and was a wild, good time, may not be the best person to care for your child.

* Choose someone who loves children. No matter how much of a good experience you may think it is for someone who swears they hate kids, don't try to teach someone a lesson. Choose someone who you know loves kids.

* Make your wishes clear. If it's important to you that your child is raised a certain way, goes to a certain college, or observes a certain holiday, spell out what you want in a letter and give it to your possible guardian, as well as attaching it to your will.

* Make financial arrangements for your child with your attorney who drafts your will.

April Masini -- nicknamed "the new millennium's Dear Abby" by the media, is author of the best-selling books Date Out Of Your League and Think & Date Like A Man, the two (just released) step-by-step dating and relationship manuals, Ideas for a Fun Date and Romantic Date Ideas, and the critically acclaimed dating and relationship online magazine www.AskApril.com.

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