Paging Dr. Google

Medical Etiquette in the Internet Age

By
Relationship Advice Expert April Masini

Q: Dear April Masini,

Lucky for both of us, my wife and I are very healthy people. We rarely visit the doctor outside routine checkups, but lately she's been going crazy on WebMD and Google every time she's not feeling well. Instead of going to the doctor's office, she'll self-diagnose and Google the best cure. If she decides she DOES need to go to the doctor, she then thinks she knows everything and basically refuses to listen to him.

Aside from the fact that this drives me nuts and is embarrassing, I'm also worried that she's going to ignore actual health problems and make up these ridiculous diagnoses based on the Internet. What can I tell her to get her back into a normal routine?

Sincerely,

Concerned Husband 

A:

Dear Concerned Husband,

Your wife's problem is a growing one. The internet has boosted the amount of information available to patients, and they come to their doctor's appointments, for the most part, better educated than ever before. However, most of the information out there is not accredited by any medical institution, making some of it not so accurate. In addition, some of the information is cutting edge and hasn't been authority tested or even processed by the physician yet.

What this means is that communication between patient and doctor is more important than ever. In fact, that's what the information technology boom has done for ALL relationships -- not just patient-doctor. It's now easier than ever to communicate faster. This process would seem to make everything easier, but what it really does is make misinformation, miscommunication and misunderstanding able to be communicated more often and faster, too!

While it's okay for your wife to do research online before seeing a doctor, it's important that she listens to his or her opinion as well.

Tips for Having a Productive Relationship with Your Doctor: 

When dealing with medical professionals, as the patient, there is a good chance you don't have the same perspective you would if you were advocating for someone. You're vulnerable, you're worried, and maybe you're scared. You're not calm, cool and collected. So here's how to get the best from your medical professional:

1. Give as much information as you have about your condition to your provider. He or she is not a psychic. If you don't tell them, they won't know.

2. Listen to them. Don't interrupt. 

3. Ask questions. Listen to the answers. Ask follow up questions. Listen to the answers.

4. Follow your doctor's regime.

5. If you are not comfortable with your doctor, switch to a doctor with whom you are comfortable. Don't stay with a doctor you don't trust. If you do, you'll probably wind up with an adversarial relationship. 

6. Don't bad mouth prior doctors to your present doctor or his/her staff. It's rude.

April Masini -- nicknamed "the new millennium's Dear Abby" by the media, is author of the best-selling books Date Out Of Your League and Think & Date Like A Man, the two (just released) step-by-step dating and relationship manuals, Ideas for a Fun Date and Romantic Date Ideas, and the critically acclaimed dating and relationship online magazine www.AskApril.com.

© 2004-2009 AskApril.com, LLC. All rights reserved. AskApril®, AskApril.com®, and Ask April® are registered trademarks owned by Masini Enterprises, Inc. This material can only be republished and redistributed if it is kept in it's original form, including, but not limited to, all AskApril branding, banners, links, books, and credits.