Shhh! Be Quiet!

Sound Sensitivity and Why Today's Generation is Addicted to Noise.

By
Relationship Advice Expert April Masini

Q: Dear April Masini,

My dad is always yelling at me to turn my music down, to mute the television, and to shut the ringer off on my cell phone. I don't understand why he's so sensitive to all of these noises! It seems like it's impossible to get along in the world if you don't just go with the flow and get used to it. My brother and I are never bothered by music that's too loud or people talking loudly on their cell phones. Is this noise bad? And why does it upset my dad so much?

Sincerely,

I Like It Loud

A:

Dear I Like It Loud, 

Different people have different levels of sensitivity. Sensitivity can be to light, sound, emotions, and sensation. That's why it makes sense that silence "sounds" different to different people. Some people can sleep through a blaring alarm clock wake-up, while others are immediately jarred into wakefulness by someone walking around in another part of the house.

Some of this sensitivity is what people are born with. Other sensitivity is what people are acclimated to. Someone who grows up in a loud, fighting family is used to dinner time with lots of arguing and emotional outbursts. This is normal to them. Other people are used to quiet dinners without much conversation and certainly no arguing. When put in different environments after several years or decades of being used to one or the other of these situations, the person used to quiet dinners will feel aurally assaulted by the noisy dinner, while the person used to noisy dinners will feel like something's wrong at a quiet dinner.

Sound Sensitivity Today.

There is definitely a trend away from silence with current generations of children being raised now. That trend starts with television as a babysitter -- and lots of it, and continues on with personal audio and video machines that they can use to constantly listen to things other than what is normally around them.

Cell phones are so prevalent now that most school age children either own one or have access on a regular basis to one. This means children are calling and listening more, programming ring tones and downloading music to their phones, and allowing quiet to be around them less.

Noise as an Addiction. 

Noise can become an addictive substance just like food can. The people who eat because they are bored, rather than hungry, are just as likely to listen to something because it is quiet rather than because they need information or contact.

This new noise generation runs the risk of being assaulted, voluntarily and in a second-hand manner, by noise to the extent that they no longer recognize or appreciate the benefits of quiet.

So, try to take some time out every day and appreciate the quiet! And understand and respect that your dad isn't used to the noise and remains sensitive to it.

April Masini -- nicknamed "the new millennium's Dear Abby" by the media, is author of the best-selling books Date Out Of Your League and Think & Date Like A Man, the two (just released) step-by-step dating and relationship manuals, Ideas for a Fun Date and Romantic Date Ideas, and the critically acclaimed dating and relationship online magazine www.AskApril.com.

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