Superhero S&M?

What Their Superhero Obsession Could Say About Them

By
Relationship Advice Expert April Masini

Q: Dear April Masini,

My boyfriend is a business man by day, and a superhero by night. Seriously though, he is obsessed with all things superhero and I just don't get it. Between his comic books, television shows, and action figures, he's always doing something superhero-related. What do you think his superhero obsession says about him?

Sincerely,

Superhero Obsessed

A:

Dear Superhero Obsessed,

Anyone with a superhero fetish has some S&M issues and some control issues going on. Superheroes save the day and control situations, ultimately. Fetishes with superheroes bring out control issues. People who fantasize about superheroes and have fetishes about them are interested in their own victimization and people who are controlling.

None of this is a bad thing. In fact, it can be a lot of fun. If you explore your feelings beyond the superhero -- what is it about the superhero that makes you feel safe, unsafe, sexual, scared, or whatever feelings they elicit in you, you can really learn a lot about yourself, your history, and the world around you.

April Masini -- nicknamed "the new millennium's Dear Abby" by the media, is author of the best-selling books Date Out Of Your League and Think & Date Like A Man, the two (just released) step-by-step dating and relationship manuals, Ideas for a Fun Date and Romantic Date Ideas, and the critically acclaimed dating and relationship online magazine www.AskApril.com.

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