Parenting: Adoption Alternatives

You aren’t sure you want to take the step to adopt a child. What are your alternatives (i.e., foster parenting, sponsoring a child, etc.)?

There are lots of alternatives to adopting a child:

*Having your own child.
*Being a foster parent.
*Being a big brother or big sister in the Big Brothers/Sisters of America organization or some other such mentoring program.
* Helping out at local hospitals, orphanages, schools and other organizations that support children but are short handed.

Why would you choose an alternative?

*If you’re not sure you can handle the day in and day out commitment of adopting a child, alternatives like foster parenting and being a big brother or sister to a child, or volunteering with children are excellent alternatives.
*If you can’t afford to adopt or keep a child, the above alternatives are also great.
*It’s a good way to test the waters and see if adopting a child is what you really want to do — success in one of the alternative fields will indicate success in an adoption.

Choosing an alternative to adopting may be a very smart decision. Adopting a child is very difficult and comes with special challenges. What are the pros and cons?

*The pros of adopting a child are pretty easy:

- taking care of a child and giving them a home they may otherwise not have
- spending your life or part of it being an adoptive parent opens your heart

*The cons are a little harder to see sometimes:

- in most cases of adoption you don’t know the child’s medical and genetic history. You may be taking on more than you think you are.
- adopting a child presents special challenges because the child may feel rejected by the birth mother and father — sounds like a simple problem, but it’s not. It’s a lifelong issue for many people.
- adopted children may have trouble blending with biological children of the same family in to which they’re adopted.