Parenting: Tips for Tricky Kid Dilemmas

Smart, actionable advice on how to handle three modern kid dilemmas.

1. My child needs to lose weight, but I want him/her to maintain a healthy body image.

Ask yourself, does my child REALLY need to lose weight? Am I the one who needs to lose weight, and I’m projecting my anxiety onto my child? Did the pediatrician suggest that my child lose weight?

While it’s true that kids are gaining more weight than they used to, historically, they are also bigger than they used to be, historically, and girls as well as boys are showing secondary sexual characteristics sooner than they used to, historically — which requires more weight on their bodies.

Don’t stress your child out if you don’t have to. Believe me, there are plenty of battles to launch, and this may not be one of them. Unless your pediatrician says your child needs to lose weight, back off.

In the meantime, do your part by stocking your kitchen with lots of healthy food.

2. I want my child to be aware of current events, but I worry the news is too scary.

Give up the control you’re trying to have. Remember, you want to launch your child into the world to be independent. This means you have to gauge what’s age appropriate for the child — and this bar has changed from what it used to be. You have to balance protecting your child from scary stuff to arming them with knowledge so that they don’t wind up victims.

If something’s in the news, rest assured that other kids in your child’s classroom have already heard it, and if you don’t give your child the information, they will get it from another kid — not great.

3. My youngster is incredibly tech-savvy/plugged in, but lacks interpersonal skills because of it.

Who’s running the household? You or the kids? Unplug the child. Could it be any easier? Since when did parents lose their cajones? Just because your child wants something doesn’t mean that it’s good for them. Be the parent. Your child needs to have interpersonal skills to be successful as a human being. It’s your job to limit plug in time.