Dating Tips: Salad Vs. His Meal

Advice For When You and Your Potential Partner Have Different Eating Habits

Advice Seeker: Dear April,

I have been on a health kick the past few years; I've lost a lot of weight and am feeling really good about myself. I just started dating an amazing man who I truly feel is my soul mate. The only thing about him giving me doubts are his nutrition habits. He eats a lot of junk food and never works out. This wouldn't be a huge problem except we'll probably start spending a lot of time together and I'm worried his bad eating habits are going to start rubbing off on me. Do you have any advice for what to do when dating people who have different diet lifestyles?

Sincerely,

Don't Tempt Me

April Masini's advice:

Dear Don't Tempt Me,

Relationships are based on mutual lifestyles and goals -- whether the members of the relationship realize it or not! And you need some relationship advice that will help you understand why you are choosing to date the people you do. Often, subconsciously, we attract -- or tend toward -- others who are doing with their lives what we want to do. If we want to live a healthy lifestyle, we tend toward others who do, also. If we say we want a healthy lifestyle, but deep down, don't, we tend toward people who are not living healthfully.

Relationship advice for when you and your partner eat differently:

When it comes to dating, like attracts like! If one of you is on a no or low carb diet, or is kosher, or only eats "Atkins" it is either very difficult -- or else takes a great deal of commitment to date someone who is on a "normal" eating track. Therefore, vegetarians tend to live together -- or else one member of the relationship is committed to accommodating the others' vegetarian (or whatever the parameters may be) lifestyle. Often, the non-vegetarian will become a vegetarian after a period of commitment.

It sounds like it shouldn't be a deal breaker in a relationship, but the truth is, if one person eats sugar and fat indiscriminately, and believes you should "live for today because tomorrow we may all be dead," as they consume the first donut in a box of Krispy Kremes, this can definitely be a deal breaker for a date who's parents died of heart disease or some other affliction that can be staffed off by healthy lifestyle -- including nutrition and diet.

My advice to daters is to find out up front what a potential date's eating habits are, the same way you'd find out if he or she is married or divorced, has or wants children, has political or religious tendencies, and is close with family or not.

For some fun dating tips that don't involve food, check out my dating books, Ideas for a Fun Date and Romantic Date Ideas.

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