Online Relationship Advice: Text-A-Date?

Advice on When It's OK to Text Message a Date and When You Should Pick Up the Phone

Advice Seeker: Dear April,

Technology and dating are giving me a headache. I cannot read guys anymore --and how should I be able to-- they don't even call--They text! I wouldn't mind it, but I can't tell whether a guy who texts me often and barely ever calls is interested and shy, or just lazy. I don't want to date a lazy guy, and I definitely don't want to date a guy who's not interested in me. Do you have any texting and dating tips?

Sincerely,

Call Me!

April Masini's advice:

Dear Call Me!,

"Faster, faster, faster!" -- No, it's not a command that one bed partner gives another -- it's the rate of love with text messaging as the medium! Text messaging makes feelings of the heart fly at lightning speed, and makes there be NO EXCUSE for not keeping in touch. It also makes wannabe polygamists good to go because they can send their love flying in 10 different directions with the flick of a fingertip. So just because you get a love message from your IM honey, doesn't mean you're the only one seeing hearts.

April's text message etiquette:

1. Keep it light and simple. No one wants to read long messages on a text device. The medium is meant for short and sweet, so keep it that way.

2. Impulsive check! Don't have three espressos and then start sending messages like crazy. Think before you hit send. Not only will you possibly send the wrong feeling to someone -- you may send it to the wrong person, altogether!

3. Don't rely on text messaging. It's a great medium for infusing relationships with sparks of delight, but it's not hardcore enough to sustain a relationship. Don't rely on text messaging for your day's communication. Follow up with a phone call.

4. Beware the text message cad. If all you get from him is text messages and sex -- you may be victim of a text message dog. Text messages and sex are not a real relationship, folks.

For more dating tips, check out Think and Date Like a Man.