Senior Advice - Grandma Goes Glam

Advice on Why Boomers are Becoming Glam-parents - And They're Taking on Senior Taboos

Relationship Advice Expert April Masini

Advice Seeker: Dear April Masini,

I'm newly divorced, approaching my 65th birthday and I'm wondering if anyone else is struggling with being a grandmother, dating, and getting older! I still feel like a spring chicken! Do you have any advice for getting older in style?

Sincerely,

Still-Goin Grandma

April Masini's advice:

Dear Still-Goin Grandma,

Grandma, get glam! Today's Glam-ma is not meddling or whining to baby-sit – because she's too busy with her own social life, career or charity causes to feel insecure about being displaced. In fact today's trendoid Glam-ma has to be begged to show up at Easter because she's probably off on a Greek ouzo and olive tasting cruise trip – again — or cramming for exams to finish her PhD studies. Today's grandma is NOT your average grandmother, mother or mother-in-law. She's glam! And it's not just her. Grandpa has his glam going, too. They are "Glam-parents" – not just grandparents, and definitely not the grandparents of generations past.

60 is the new 40:

Today's glam-parents are running races, doing yoga, and working out with weights at the gym; they're having plastic surgery, surfing the web, and internet dating. Are you getting the picture? They're looking, thinking, acting, and living life as if they are 10-15 years younger than they are (or at least 10-15 years younger than they would have just a generation ago). Sixty is the new 40 and 70 is the new 50! Don't try to do the math. Just get the picture. And if you don't believe me, check out the 21-year-old grandchild getting carded at a nightclub while Glam-ma is getting "carded" trying to receive a senior discount at the movie theater! She doesn't look anywhere near early-bird special age.

More in tuned with eating right, pop culture, and technological advances, Glam-parents are cooler and hipper than their grandparent predecessors — they've been through the sexual revolution, grew up watching TV, have cell phones, and know who Usher is … Glam-parents and Glam-children can IM each other on their computers everyday. Instead of asking their Glam-children what kind of cookies little Britney or Caleb would like for Christmas, Glam-parents can ask if little Britney or Caleb wants something from E-Bay for Christmas.

Stacy's Mom May Have It Goin' On -- But, Wait To You Meet Her Glam - mama!

Online dating may first have been adopted by people a third their age, but modern mating has virtually been taken over by Glam-parents. They may be single, but they're not lonely. They know how to use the computer and the internet, and they're interested in online dating. Forget about Bingo -- they're grocery shopping and boyfriend/ girlfriend shopping on the net. In fact, you'd better hide Glam-ma from the likes of Ashton Kutcher, and other men who like a mature woman, since age-ism is no longer discrimination - it's a hot, hip quotient!

Many Glammers are not just going back to school, having therapy and yoga sessions to improve mind and body, they're having a plastic surgery make overs. Not only does it make them feel better, they take their cues from Demi Moore, who had her day (or week) under the knife, and hasn't looked back since she snagged a younger man to spend her days and nights with. Older women and younger men have always been around, but now the trend is more prevalent than ever. So don't be surprised if your single mother-in-law wants to date one of your male friends! And if she's married and doesn't want to date one of your male friends, Glam-pa may be dabbling in Viagra or Cialis, revving senior sex lives to match yours!

Glam-parents Are Taking On Senior Taboos

Our society doesn't celebrate romance and sex among seniors. In fact our books and movies rarely depict grandma and grandpa having an exciting romantic and sexual relationship … at least until now! With Tina Turner over 60, and Sophia Loren pushing 70 — Sean Connery approaching mid 70's and Paul Newman pushing 80 — it's cool, hip, and downright sexy to be a senior these days. In fact, a recent study of 1,300 men and women over the age of 60 by the National Council on the Aging found that 61 per cent of the men and 37 per cent of the women were sexually active. Some 61 per cent of the men and 62 per cent of the women said that sex was as satisfying as or more satisfying than it was when they were in their 40s. Nope, grandparents just aren't what they used to be — they're even better!

The X Factor:

Today's baby-booming glam-ma's are friendly and kind to the ex-wife. Not like the old mother-in-law who feuds and holds long grudges against her ex-daughter-in-law. In fact, today's glam-ma knows what it's like to be an ex because many times she is one herself. And sometimes she's even a dating dynamo. Online dating services have "silver memberships" for silver-haired daters over the age of 60 – although most of them don't have silver hair. So be prepared for your baby-boomer glam-ma in-law to bring a date to Thanksgiving this year.

Glam-parents are divorced just as much as anyone else, so that means that not only is your glam-ma-in-law likely to be dating, she's going to know what it's like to have an ex, and she'll have a much more compassionate attitude about family than mother-in-laws used to. She also may ask you to keep your eyes open for a great date …. And it's the wise daughter-in-law who does fix up her Glam-ma-in-law. The more of a life the mother-in-law has, the less she interferes in your life.

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April Masini -- nicknamed "the new millennium's Dear Abby" by the media, is author of the best-selling books Date Out Of Your League and Think & Date Like A Man, the two (just released) step-by-step dating and relationship manuals, Ideas for a Fun Date and Romantic Date Ideas, and the critically acclaimed dating and relationship online magazine www.AskApril.com.