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Better Sex Tips Pleasurable Positions

Better Sex Tips Pleasurable Positions

By Sex Therapist, Dr. Diana Wiley View more articles

There are many pleasurable positions, whether missionary, side-by-side, from-behind, or woman-on-top.  I’m going to explore some variations on the latter carnal configurations.

First, it is important for lovers to know that only around 20 to 30 percent of women can reach orgasm during intercourse and by thrusting alone.  Many women who do come during intercourse need a little help from fingers, either their own or their partner’s, or help from a small vibrator.  Remember the clitoris – that pleasure button (and what is around it and behind it) – has  approximately 8,000 nerve fibers – twice as many as in the penis!  It’s possible to have intercourse with no orgasm at all and experience it as being wonderful and intimate.

The X-Position

The partners lean back and face each other, pelvises interlocked.  The woman wraps her slightly bent legs on either side of his torso.  His penis is inside her vagina.  They can hold each other’s hands for balance and rocking – increasing their speed as they come closer to climaxing. Like the missionary, this X-position enables the couple to have the body-to-body contact – along with intimate eye gazing. In addition, they can grind into each other slowly, then speed up…or go deep, then tease with shallow penetrations.  In this position the clitoris is easy to reach for added stimulation. 

Kneeling or lying on top of her supine partner, she can control the speed, rhythm and angle of penetration in a way that arouses her most.
  The woman can move her pelvis against her partner’s so that her clitoris rubs against his public bone; for some, this is an effective way to trigger an orgasm.  Or, either of them can touch her clitoris while he is inside her.  A good way for a man to learn what angles his partner prefers is to pay close attention when she’s on top.  Or, ask!

This rear-vaginal-entry is a turn-on for many.  Lots of men enjoy the sight of the female butt raised and displayed for his pleasure.  This position provides deep penetration – with a tighter fit.  Also, the angle of entry makes it easier for the penis to stimulate the front wall of the vagina – and maybe even the G-Spot!  She can push her buttocks against her partner, returning his thrusts. 

Doing the deed from behind can take on another variation: he lies back in a chair, legs spread, feet on the floor.  She straddles his lap with her back to him and stretches her arms to a table’s edge.  He should thrust in small circles while she keeps her legs together.  The guy can tease with deep up-and-down motions, and if he lifts her body up a bit, he can watch himself enter his partner – a real visual turn-on.

Give free rein to your imagination – and be more playful and experimental.  How many positions can you think of?  Lying down, sitting up, standing up, twisted up like pretzels, standing on your heads!  You can have sex any way you want, as long as the right parts fit together.  Get a book with illustrations of all kinds of different sexual positions. If you look through books of ancient Japanese, Chinese and Indian art, you may be inspired by those ancient people who didn’t feel guilty about enjoying sexual pleasure.
A few months ago I spoke at a sexuality conference in India.
  I was re-inspired by the Kama Sutra!  One couple I was seeing was as well, and the wife reported:  “I can’t tell you how much fun my husband and I have had trying out all these positions in the Kama Sutra.  Some are intensely pleasurable.  But others are so complicated, you’d have to be made of rubber to twist your body into them. Have you ever tried crossing your ankles behind your neck?  That’s always good for a laugh!” And that reminds me of a joke:  What does the blonde put behind her ears for attention?  Her ankles!

We like to make sex varied and articulate.  We like to tinker and we like to soar.  And, for sure, we like to have intercourse!

Dr. Diana Wiley, has been a Board-Certified Sex Therapist, diplomat of the American Board of Sexology, a clinical Sexologist, and a licensed marriage and family therapist for over 20 years. Her extensive professional experience and views on sex and the erotic make her a true sex guru and evangelist, and her versatility and breadth of expertise have brought with them numerous spots on national television and radio programs—including her own popular broadcast, Live With Dr. Diana. She can be reached at

For more on Dr. Diana Wiley please visit