Advice on How to Tell Someone They Need to Work on Their Appearance (Before They Ask You Out) What To Do When You Don't Like His Looks
What To Do When You Don't Like His Looks
Dear April Masini,
I met a nice guy..but he's missing his front teeth. This is a big turn off. I don't want to be mean, but I really can't see myself dating a guy who doesn't have his front teeth. Do you have any advice for how I can tell him to call me when he gets some teeth?"
Under The Gum
April Masini's Advice :
Dear Under The Gum,
If you're interested in him, but not attracted to him because of some facet of his appearance, in your case -- your guy is missing a few teeth – get some more information about what it is that offends you. For instance, in his case, you don't like his lack of teeth, so ask him how he lost his teeth. If he ate a case of candy bars and didn’t floss for a decade, so they all fell out, that’s one thing. Not a good thing, but at least you know more than the fact that he lost his teeth. You know how he lost them. If he lost his teeth wrestling a murderer to the ground, and saved the lives of a potential murder victim, only to bang his jaw on the murderer’s weapon, while he was apprehending the bad guy, and lost his teeth in the heroic act, then you may find his lack of choppers to be a bit of a turn on.
However, aside from the way he lost his teeth, you don’t like the look. And you're clear and unwavering about that. So tell him that you bet he'd look very attractive and sexy with new teeth. See what his reaction is. It would be interesting to find out why he hasn’t had any dental work done. Are these newly lost teeth? Does he have cancer of the jaw? Does he just happen to be meeting with an oral surgeon next week? His answer and response will help you decide what to do next. In fact, if he seems open to it, give him the name of a good dentist that you know.
Sometimes men -- and women, frankly, also -- need a little push towards getting it right. You can give him a copy of my book, Date Out Of Your League, and tell him that he should read it if he's at all interested in you! One of the big pieces of advice I give men and women is to be your best self. You'll gain an edge in the dating world, and you'll feel better about yourself if you take good care of your body on a regular basis. Of course, if he's missing something as basic as his teeth, and he hasn't had them replaced on his own, he may be very eccentric or he may have a lower standard of grooming than most people, which would make me wonder what else he doesn't take care of.
As a single mother of three, it's okay for you to drop a few hints and give him some friendly advice on improving his appearance, but you don't want to take on a project in a boyfriend or future husband. You have enough on your plate already. Besides, if you focus on yourself and your own life, I bet you'll meet a lot of men who actually have all their teeth!